Post by scooter on Jan 9, 2022 4:01:01 GMT -5
Had a good friend who played the bass with a symphony orchestra. Naturally, one of the pieces he was most familiar with was Beethoven's 9th Symphony, containing the famous "Ode to Joy". Now, that part occurs right at the end, and he let me in on an interesting fact: there's a period just prior to that in the Symphony of about twenty minutes where the basses basically don't have anything to do. They just sit there. And that's rather boring...so they came up with a more pleasant way to pass the time - namely, drinking. One of them would procure a bottle of something good and stash it backstage, and then, when that section hit, they'd nip off for a few and come back when it was their part.
Now the conductor couldn't exactly stop the concert and call them back to their seats, so instead he would raise the tempo of the piece, cutting down on their drinking time and causing them to scramble back rather than leisurely rejoining the orchestra.
Given that one of the bass players had just acquired an extremely good (and potent!) bottle of bourbon, this wouldn't do, of course - so my friend got an idea. Prior to that evening's concert, he found the maestro's score, slipped off a shoelace (having nothing else handy), and tied the page just before the last bass part down to the podium -- that way, the conductor couldn't zip through and get to the last bass part without untying the sheet he needed to turn...and good luck doing that when you're clutching a baton in one hand.
So, the concert began, the lull was reached, and the basses quietly excused themselves and commenced to some serious backstage drinking. The conductor, grinning, then furious sped the orchestra up to the point where they'd have to come back -- but then discovered that shoelace. And was forced to repeat bits of the Ninth Symphony while waiting for the bass players, who were now thoroughly drunk, to stumble back to their seats so he could finish the piece. But of course, there was nothing the maestro could do. After all...
It was the bottom of the Ninth, the score was tied, and the basses were loaded!
G'night, everybody! Tip your waitstaff!!