PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Sept 6, 2021 1:09:18 GMT -5
This question is upsetting for all animal lovers, and I apologize for asking it, but I have a cat who is in her teens now, she's losing a lot of weight, her nose has changed from a pinky colour to a yellowish colour, she still eats alright, but she's looking very frail and is getting more and more lethargic as time moves on, she can't stand being touched anymore and she's just...totally off from her normal self. I've taken her to a vet and they haven't found a known cause for this as yet, but I'm worried that maybe this is her reaching her time and she's just slowly fading away in front of me? I don't want her to be in pain, I hate the thought that I'm letting her suffer because I'm selfishly keeping her alive. What are some signs that maybe it is indeed her time? Is it more cruel to let her suffer or to put her to sleep if she is indeed at that stage?
I've had to deal with losing pets a few times over the years, it's never easy, but this is the first time I've been wondering if I'm being cruel to an animal by keeping her alive when she might be suffering.
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Sept 6, 2021 9:29:36 GMT -5
PGen98, My heart aches for you! These are questions I personally have asked myself as well. We've lost animals & the pain is always there. Our dog who passed away in 2012, it took me months to be okay. I had salt burns around my eyes from all the crying. She was Mommy's girl. When we were going to the vet, a lady was there saying she just put hers down. I asked, How do you know when it's time? She replied- "You just know." I honestly didn't believe that we would 'just know'. But lo & behold, when our baby couldn't get up anymore, even though her eyes were alert, we had this feeling of "It's time". & honestly, we just lost our 18 year old cat in July. Elderly animals tend to 'change'. I honestly think all creatures do as we get older. I knew it was nearing the end when she, normally Mommy's lapcat & shadow, didn't want much to do with me anymore. Another sign is they go off to be by themselves more & more. My advice, as this is quite fresh for me as well, as long as she's eating, going to the bathroom, alert, active, even if she's not her usual self, it's not time yet. If she starts hiding & going off by herself, know that the end is near because SHE knows it is. This is the most difficult decision we have to make!
|
|
|
Post by lainee on Sept 6, 2021 16:06:15 GMT -5
PGen98, ZandraJoi, It was heart-wrenching reading your stories and it's always painful to let a beloved pet go. What's truly amazing is that when THEY know it's time, somehow YOU will know, too. Thinking of you both and sending hugs.
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Sept 7, 2021 20:59:57 GMT -5
ZandraJoi, lainee, Thank you both for responding, and there is truth to that, they do tend to know it in themselves from what I remember of my other animals when it was that time (I try not to remember that time and keep focused on the happy times, but of course you dwell on it!). I'm worried we're nearing that point with this little fur baby, Moto (my sister named her that because when she came into our lives those "Hello, Moto" Motorola commercials were everywhere, so we had to have our own Hello, Moto ), because she does spend a lot more time by herself, she's getting sick a lot and she's recently developed this desire to not use her litterbox...distressing, and something we took her to the vet for, but nothing comes up. So, I'm worried we're missing signs that this is it and just letting her suffer callously.
|
|
|
Post by lainee on Sept 8, 2021 15:10:20 GMT -5
PGen98, You're welcome. And, loved your 'Hello Moto' story:) Cute! That's a sweet little memory you have there & hopefully it'll make you smile later. There's a fine line between not wanting her to suffer and aching to keep her with you as long as you can. I think she'll probably decide that for you. Take care & HUGS
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Sept 8, 2021 20:03:04 GMT -5
I too try not to think on any of our pets passing. Time does help but it still is a loss & we mourn. That is cute on the name! We too didn’t want to be selfish in having our loved one live just for us humans. Please keep us updated as I know this will be tough. Big Hugs to you
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Sept 9, 2021 21:27:25 GMT -5
Thank you both again I'll do my best to keep you updated, as I do worry it is getting very close to that time. Hoping for the best for her, though!
|
|
|
Post by lainee on Sept 10, 2021 20:17:37 GMT -5
PGen98, You're quite welcome...and, yes, hoping for the best for her. Enjoy your time together... it'll help you both :-)
|
|
|
Post by Bob on Sept 17, 2021 17:13:34 GMT -5
Losing a pet is very difficult. We have lost a dog and a cat in the past. Very hard to know when it is time.
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Oct 7, 2021 0:28:21 GMT -5
I have to agree, it just seems like they pick the time and place and that's it. I feel it coming with my cat, though, she just looks more frail by the day. I'm going to take her into the vet again soon and see if anything is found, because as I said above, I don't want to be cruel and have her suffering day and in day out because I'm being selfish and not letting her go when it's her time. If she's suffering, that's cruel. If she's not suffering, just aging, then I can live with that and work to make her life better in certain ways.
|
|
shole
Stargazer
Posts: 41
Likes: 43
|
Post by shole on Oct 9, 2021 7:47:14 GMT -5
I am for putting down animals, as it seems to cause them pain sometimes, and a lot of it as well. The thing is how moral is it? I have no idea, but I saw many old dogs and cats, who were clearly in pain and you can't do anything but feel sorry for them while they try to move or to eat...it's just too sad. I hate it but it's life, so you have the choice to make it quick and painless or let them suffer until they pass away.
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Oct 14, 2021 9:46:05 GMT -5
PGen98, Did you end up taking her to the vet? This was a dilemma we had as well. shole, I feel it's moral to put down a sick creature. I think it's cruel to make them suffer. While it is nature, if we can help prevent suffering, why not?
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Oct 24, 2021 15:30:34 GMT -5
shole, You're right, when it's patently obvious that an animal is suffering or struggling, then it makes sense to ease their pain. It's such a difficult decision to make, because they are family, but you have to do what is in their best interest. ZandraJoi, We did take her back to the vet, and they still can't pinpoint any source of pain for her, and they're not willing to say whether or not she is suffering. She's just down a lot, not wanting to do anything, losing weight and while she does eat, it doesn't seem to make a difference. We're not sure how to move forward, honestly.
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Oct 24, 2021 20:32:02 GMT -5
ZandraJoi , We did take her back to the vet, and they still can't pinpoint any source of pain for her, and they're not willing to say whether or not she is suffering. She's just down a lot, not wanting to do anything, losing weight and while she does eat, it doesn't seem to make a difference. We're not sure how to move forward, honestly. You can always try another vet. I prefer holistic ones myself though unfortunately we don't have one close enough here.
Is she hiding, withdrawing more from her humans? If so, you have your answer there
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Oct 25, 2021 3:22:10 GMT -5
ZandraJoi , We did take her back to the vet, and they still can't pinpoint any source of pain for her, and they're not willing to say whether or not she is suffering. She's just down a lot, not wanting to do anything, losing weight and while she does eat, it doesn't seem to make a difference. We're not sure how to move forward, honestly. You can always try another vet. I prefer holistic ones myself though unfortunately we don't have one close enough here.
Is she hiding, withdrawing more from her humans? If so, you have your answer there
She's always been one to sort of withdraw, but she still comes and say her hellos as she always has done, so she's not really changing her habits, just looking poorly all the time. It's very difficult to tell with her what's wrong, and we have actually been to a couple of different vets with her, because we like second opinions. I haven't found any holistic ones around this area, but we do try to find vets that are outside of the big chains and such to ensure it's not totally about money.
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Dec 17, 2021 10:59:11 GMT -5
PGen98, Is there an update on your cat? I know it's been rough for you!
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Dec 20, 2021 22:14:27 GMT -5
PGen98 , Is there an update on your cat? I know it's been rough for you! She's been a little bit better these past couple of weeks, no major issues. She's been sick a couple of times, but otherwise doing ok. I'm still worried about her, but less so at the moment!
|
|
|
Post by ZandraJoi on Dec 21, 2021 9:25:28 GMT -5
PGen98, I'm so glad! We'll always worry but if she seems to be doing better, that's a good sign
|
|
PGen98
Astronomer
Posts: 126
Likes: 138
|
Post by PGen98 on Dec 21, 2021 20:03:38 GMT -5
PGen98 , I'm so glad! We'll always worry but if she seems to be doing better, that's a good sign Oh absolutely, I've got my eyes firmly on her to make sure she's ok. Paranoid a bit, but happy that she seems to be doing better
|
|